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Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Selling My Books on the Streets of Brooklyn 8/14 - Romcom

My thanks to the folks who bought and donated books today. I found nothing interesting to blog about, so here's an excerpt from my romcom screenplay, A Truth Universally Acknowledged, which was influenced by Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice and Shakespeare's The Taming of the Shrew. It was written pre-9/11. It's rather long, but a fast read. Best guess 10 minutes:
With Ellington's Take the A Train playing in the background, Joe begins a mad dash across the trading floor to the elevator. At the ground floor he bolts onto the concourse, dodging people all the way to the subway station. After getting off in the Village, he runs through the station, takes the stairs to the street two at a time, evading pedestrians, vehicles. He aims to head Kate off at her door, to speak to her face to face. As he reaches her block, he sees her approaching from the opposite direction. He sprints toward her, calling out.
Joe:
   Katie!
   Surprised, she tenses. She seems trapped, as if she'd like to flee but doesn't know which way to turn. She's wearing sunglasses to hide her tears. He stops short and throws his arms around her, kisses her brow. He is breathing so hard he is unable to speak. He breaks from her and bends at the waist, panting. She, concerned, places a hand on his shoulder.
Kate:
   Are you alright?
Joe:
   You know CPR?
   He sits on the stoop. She sits beside him. Having recovered sufficiently, he slings an arm around her and presses his forehead to hers, still breathing fast.
Joe:
   I can't remember the last time I ran that hard. Maybe when some cop was chasin' me
through the schoolyard.
Kate:
   Thank goodness you're in shape.
Joe:
   You're not kiddin'.
Kate:
   Why'd you run? You could've called.
Joe:
   I dunno. I panicked, I guess. I was afraid you'd hang up as soon as you heard my voice.  I was afraid you wouldn't let me up if you got here before me.
   Pained, she looks away.
Kate:
   I thought you'd hustled me, that you really didn’t care.
Joe:
   After last night?  What's wrong with you?
   She avoids his gaze.
Kate:
   We didn't exactly part on a high note. I thought you might've been fed up with me. 
Then what your brother told me.
Joe:
   I've been on such a high all mornin'. You brought me luck. I made a killin' today.
She looks away, afraid. He reaches toward her chin, gently tilts her face toward him,
removes her sunglasses, looks her in the eye.
Joe:
   I never felt about nobody the way I feel about you.
   Tears well briefly in her eyes. She bucks up.
Kate:
   "Anybody" - I never felt about "anybody...."
   He smiles.
Joe:
   I wanted to see if you were payin' attention.
Kate:
   Yeah, right.
Joe:
   In grammar there's this thing called "Agreement."
   Her eyes spread with surprise.
Joe:
   It was in the GED study book..
  She smirks. He takes her hand, pulls her to her feet.
Joe:
   Wanna take a ride someplace?
Kate:
   I don't know. I'd feel guilty. I'm supposed to be home sick. I've never taken a sick day
in my life.
Joe:
   Sounds like you can use a day off.
Kate:
   I'm afraid I'd make it a habit..... Ah, what the hell? Just this once.Where are you
parked?
Joe:
   In Brooklyn. C'mon, we'll take the subway. Or is that too "bourgeois" for you?
   She begrudges a smile.
Kate:
   I was just on the subway, wise guy. What about your customers?
   He waves, indifferent.
   In his car, top down, with Ellington's It Don't Mean a Thing If It Ain't Got That Swing playing, they hit the highway, laughing, smiling. They lunch in Sheepshead Bay, then stroll along the area. They settle on a bench facing the water.
Kate:
   It's really nice here.
Joe:
   See? Brooklyn's not all bad.
Kate:
   I hope this conversation's not going where I think it's going.
   Joe shrugs.
Joe:
   You wanna spend the rest of your life beatin' people up in magazines?
   She chuckles.
Kate:
   I'd really like to write novels and short stories, but I haven't had the guts to sit down and
try it yet.
Joe:
   You no guts? I find that hard to believe.
Kate:
   I haven't failed too often in my life, at least not at anything I really cared about. And
writing fiction is what I care about most. I don't know how I'd handle the failure of not
being able to do it.
Joe:
   You do like anybody else - get up, dust yourself off, and give it another shot. Forty
percent of my trades are losers.
   She doesn't know what to say.
Joe:
   Let me put you on the spot. I'll make a deal with you. You have my children and you can stay home and write all you want. We'll buy a house and set up a nice quiet room for
you. I'll take care of the kids at night.
   She stares at him.
Kate:
   You're not serious?
Joe:
   Oh, no?
Kate:
   We hardly know each other. And I'm supposed to trust you'll keep your word?
Joe:
   I think I know you. Ever get the feelin' that some things're meant to be? Think about it.  Of all the brokers at the exchange, Dawn brought you to me. Then, a month later, we ended up at the same charity affair. Then we played golf and I didn't ever realize I broke 90 for the first time in my life 'cause I was havin' such a great time.
Kate:
   People who believe in that type of thing are eventually going to get slammed
mercilessly by reality.
Joe:
   I'm willin' to take that risk, just like I do every day in the ring.  The potential reward
makes it worth it.
Kate:
   Katherine Hepburn says that any man who marries a career woman is a fool.
Joe:
   It wouldn't be the same. You'd he workin' at night atta the house.
Kate:
   You know, I'm not even sure I like you.
Joe:
   You coulda fooled me last night.
Kate:
   But that might not have anything to do with love. That might be just a temporary match up of hormones.
Joe:
   Who's zoomin' who now?
Kate:
   And I definitely can't see me having kids.
Joe:
   What? How can you not want kids? Think how happy your mother and father'd be. 
You're their one 'n only.
Kate:
   Thanks for reminding me. I hate being torn between disappointing them and contributing to the overpopulation of the world.
Joe:
   The world is not overpopulated. That's the biggest crock goin'. Not enough kids're bein' born. That's the problem. The fertility rate in Italy's down to 1.2. Italians are gonna be extinct by their own hands in a hundred years. And who's gonna pay the taxes for Social Security end Medicare over here?
Kate:
   Oh, my God, you've read an op-ed piece!  A little knowledge is a dangerous thing in
the wrong hands.
Joe:
   Op-what?
Kate:
   Op .... I hate when you do that!
   He chuckles as she swats at him.
   Later, he parks at the end of a road in Manhattan Beach (Brooklyn). They exit. A
beautiful ranch-style house sits at the foot of the ocean to their right.  Kate is impressed.
Joe:
   This's my favorite house in the world.
Kate:
   I'd've never thought there'd be one like it in Brooklyn. My impression of Brooklyn is
Greenpoint, where me grandparents lived. I hated it there.
Joe:
   Wouldn't this be a great place for a writer to live?
Kate:
   Can you afford a place like this?
Joe:
   Only in my dreams. Maybe the taxes on it. I know guys who bought mansions when
times were good. A few years later the market dried up and they had to sell. I'm smarter
than that, I hope.
   They stand looking out to sea.  Kate leans against Joe, who wraps his arms around her.
Joe:
   Marry me and all this is yours. 
     She chuckles.
Kate:
   A vast, empty expanse? Stop trying to hustle me. Let's take it slow and see what
happens. Why are you in such a hurry?
Joe:
   'cause I'm 37 years old and I don't have any kids. If I wait much longer I might not be 
able to play ball with 'em. You're not scared about your clock tickin' away?
Kate:
   I have so much to accomplish that I haven't even thought about it.
Joe:
   How d'you know you're not gonna wake up one day ten years from now and all of a
sudden wish you'd had kids?
Kate:
   I can't imagine myself ever being that weak.
Joe:
   You're a better man then I am, Gunga Din.
   She smiles.
Joe:
   I've been out with hundreds of girls, and not once did I ever come close to feelin' like I
do when I'm with you. And I know if anything ever happened to me you'd be there for our kids. You'd be like an onnymahl if somebody tried to hurt ‘em. I know you would, I just know it.
   She is clearly moved.
Joe:
   And I know you'll learn 'em good English. 
     She chuckles, then becomes serious.
Kate:
   I will never live in Brooklyn.
Joe:
   Not even where I live? We got all these artists and writers comin' in, takin' advantage
of bein' close to the city without havin' to pay shylock rent. Everybody laughed when I
bought that place. They thought I was nuts 'cause of the neighborhood. I was way ahead
of the curve.
Kate:
   You helped push the poor people out. And next the yuppies'll push the artists out.
Joe:
   Gentrification. Lotta poor people in the Village and on the Upper West Side.
   She smirks.
Joe:
   I helped build the neighborhood back up. And now all the weirdos think I'm yuppie
scum, even my tenants.  Imagine that all these mammelukes from all over the country -
all over the world, look down their noses at me, who's lived in Brooklyn his life.
Kate:
   There's just no justice in this rotten world.
   He hangs his head.
Joe:
   You're right. A guy with my dough should never whine. I should laugh at 'em. So
whattaya say - move in with me.
Kate:
   Williamsburg is a poor substitute for Manhattan.  I'm just not amenable to compromise.
   Joe nibbles at her ear.
Joe:
   I'm gonna hafta start carryin' a pocket dictionary.
Kate:
   It would only do you good.
Joe:
   Your place is a studio, right?
Kate:
   Yes.
Joe:
   We definitely can't live there.
   He falls into thought.
Joe:
   I can always sell the building. It's triple the value I bought it at. That should be good
for a coupla months Manhattan rent.
Kate:
   You're getting way ahead of yourself, Romeo.
Joe:
   Try to keep up.
   He nips at her ear again.
Kate:
   Stop!  That makes me crazy.
Joe:
   Oh?
   He holds her tightly and nibbles again. She tries to fight free, laughs. Finally she
manages to do so. They walk back to the car, pause as they are about to enter, look at
each other.
Kate:
   I absolutely do not cook.
Joe:
   I'll cook. When I don't feel like it we'll have McDonalds.
Kate:
   McDonalds!
Joe:
   You like Burger King better? Burger King, then.
Kate:
   You're such a clown.
   Close-up of a dummy clown. They are now in Coney Island. They ride the Cyclone
(rollercoaster), then the Wonder (ferris) Wheel, on which they neck like teenagers.  Later,
Joe purchases franks and sodas at Nathan's. He offers a frank to Kate, who makes a face. He shrugs and begins devouring them.
Vic's 4th Novel: http://tinyurl.com/bszwlxh
Vic's 3rd Novel: http://tinyurl.com/7e9jty3
Vic's Website: http://members.tripod.com/vic_fortezza/Literature/
Vic's Short Story Collection (Print or Kindle): http://www.tiny.cc/Oycgb
Vic's 2nd Novel: http://tinyurl.com/6b86st6
Vic's 1st Novel: http://tiny.cc/94t5h
Vic's Screenplay on Kindle: http://tinyurl.com/cyckn3
Vic’s Short Story on Kindle: http://tinyurl.com/k95k3nx



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